I've got the giggles today. I must have a fever. Or I'm just a nitwit. Either one is a plausable excuse.
What I'm listening to now - since I've managed to figure out how to download all the music from my computer to my mp3 player - Wild, Wild Life by Talking Heads. Ah, yes. "Spending all of my money and time on too much wild, wild life". That would be me at Pennsic. LOL!
This place is so dead I expect a tumbleweed to blow thru here at any minute. There was another person here this morning but she left at lunch. I'm the only warm body for two hallways. And people think this isn't a vacation for ME when they are gone! HA!
I've managed to actually get some stuff done. Besides downloading all of my music I mean. I still need to go on my "procurement run". I might have to do that shortly once I finish this.
Anyone have any good new years resolutions to share? Didn't think so. I haven't quite thought of any yet aside from the "drink more good wine" as opposed to "bad wine" (like there is such a thing when you're a lush! LOL!)
Maybe take two skating tests so my test level actually reflects my ABILITY level. That'd be kinda nice.
Uhm - not to bounce any checks (I did once). Bad girl!
That's about all I can think of. The hell with that "lose weight" thing. I managed to FIND the 5 lbs I lost before. Dammit to hell!
Get this - I got an email from the photog who took those pix of me before - seems he wants me to "model" for him again. Huh? o_O I told him I cut my hair (I figured he had a "thing" for the hair) but apparently it doesn't matter. Just kinda weird he'd want me to come back so he could try out some ideas. LOL! Don't get any ideas you pervs! He's married with a young daughter and his WIFE is there with us. And the dog. Such a cute cocker spaniel!
I wanted to do it sometime later in January when I'm not bloated but he wants to do it ASAP. Then he reminded me of the magic that is photoshop. Excellent point! That can make ANYONE look good.
Methinks I might up my "fee" this time. Now I want not one but TWO - yes, count them! TWO Diet Cokes! My outrageous diva demands know no decent human bounds!
Hmmmm. Wonder if he'd pay me
? Since it would appear I've already taken a bite out of him anyway. Hey, why not?
Tonight Steve and I are going to dinner with some of his friends. I am concerned about my giggling fits. I'll try to behave and not bust up too much.
Someone needs to tell me how to get these stupid ear things to actually STAY in my ears. They keep coming out. Rrrrr!
This mp3 player is great. I was using it at the gym the other day and everytime a song would come on I'd say "oh, wow! I really like this song!" Then I realized "DUH! I programmed the damn thing so it SHOULD have stuff on there I like!" Almost like having my own radio station! Woooo hooooo!
In case you haven't quite figured this out about me yet - I'm easily amused. What can I say?
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 1:36 PM
Don't get all excited. I'm not about to reveal anything incriminating so if that's what you're hoping for, well, you'll just have to look elsewhere. I may be dim but I'm not completely oblivious! LOL!
In no particular order, the things I feel like revealing to the whole wide world are:
**Sometimes I eat things not because I'm hungry but because I like the way they feel in my mouth. I love the feel of mashed potatoes (instant when they are firm), grits, ice cream and pudding skin. LOVE. And I will eat this stuff just to FEEL it. (Now does it come as a surprise to anyone that I'm "orally fixated". LOL!)
**I have never been comfortable being a female unless it's around gay men. They don't care.
**I hate what my job has done to me. How much of a hateful bitch it has made me. I can't be civil to anyone at this damned place because they try to take advantage of it. It's so fucking cutthroat.
**When I'm on the ice I feel beautiful. I am beautiful when I skate. I would rather skate than have sex. There, I said it. A bad day on the ice is better than a good lay because skating is all about ME. Sex is not.
**Sometimes I wish I could just run away to Yosemite or somewhere wild like that and live in my yurt. That way I wouldn't have to deal with the morons and haters who inhabit this planet in droves.
**On occassion, I've made myself throw up after I've eaten or drank too much.
**I regret not giving my parents grandchildren.
**I am envious of Lilibean. She is so talented and smart. She makes me a jealous bitch.
**Just once I'd like to have a sugar daddy. For about two months. Someone who buys me stuff just because I look good (to him).
**I hate this weather but I'm afraid to leave my parents. It will be up to ME to take care of them if they are no longer able to do it themselves. So I can't leave.
**I hate him for lying to us about who he truly is.
**I hate her for being so fucking boney it makes the rest of us look OBESE in comparison (eventho WE are the normal ones and SHE is the FREAK). And yet I'd love to be that skinny. Just once so I could wear anything.
**One day I'm going to fly into Frankfurt airport and watch the arrivals/departures board. When a cool place I've never been pops up on that board, I'm going to hop that flight. Just because I can.
**Everytime I hear my married girlfriends bitch about how useless/lazy their husbands are I'm glad I never got married in the first place. Husbands are a burden.
**I refuse to get a cell phone because I don't want people to be able to find me whenever THEY want.
**I wish Steve had never found my blog because what he reads here upsets him more often than not.
**I ordered Linda a present for Christmas but when it came in the mail I knew my dad would love it. So I gave it to him instead.
**Sometimes I just lay around and sleep when I should go to the gym, skate, clean or do something productive. And I feel so guilty about it.
**I miss Mr. Wicked. A lot.
Enough of that! Here's something to make you giggle. At least, it makes me giggle. Favorite messageboard quote of the day: "I too thought it was a particularly peculiar day. I posted a thread about favorite (TV) Christmas episodes (sic) and the third post wished me death. Nothing says 'Merry Christmas' like a death wish."
Where do people come up with this stuff? That still cracks me up.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 12:44 PM
Happy Hanukkah, Happy Solstice, Happy Kawanzaa or whatever it is you celebrate this time of year.
Yesterday I went home. Mom called me and said that she and dad had eaten every bit of that candy that I took them last week. WTF? ALL of it - GONE. Not so much as a gingerbread man left. And they kept bitching about how they didn't LIKE gingerbread. *snort*
So I had to take more for them since we had guests. Amazing.
I stayed all night there but I didn't get any sleep. Thanks to The Creature. For whatever reason he decided he wanted to sleep with ME instead of mom and dad.
He snored. Loud. He snotted and snorted and jumped on and off of the bed all freakin' night! AHHHHHH! I wanted to beat him. But I couldn't. He does that all the time. I'm just not used to it.
So after dinner I ended up falling asleep on the couch. He, of course, couldn't stand it and had to snort and snot and jump on me. I was too tired to notice and mom threw him off but not before he managed to lick my face.
But it was nice being home. I got lots of books and three new oil lamps. That will keep me entertained for quite some time. I have already managed to finish one of the books. Heeee! A good book is like food. You just eat it up!
Now I'm doing laundry and the dishes. Then I will read some more and go to bed.
I've finally finished Mr. Wicked's saga. I thought I would never get done! And since he's been gone it was sort of hard and a little sad finishing it.
I had written 3 separate endings but none of them seemed to work right. So I combined them into one. I was happy with it. It ended the way he wanted but it was a quiet ending.
I still can't get over I was writing on that thing for an entire year! That is crazy! But I was "possessed" in a way so it really wasn't ME. Just my fingers on the keys. Glad I know how to type pretty fast.
Now maybe I can make some new garb and practice my violin more. I also need to get my butt in gear for that test session in March.
Strange how much time his story took up. If I wasn't writing it I was listening to him go on about it. Now it's quiet. It's rather weird.
I think I'm going to take this opportunity to get rid of a lot of things around here that I don't use anymore. It seems like there is more and more "junk" lying around and it's rather annoying. Either I need to get rid of it or put it away somewhere.
That will be one of my "new years" projects - get rid of stuff. Also start making another quilt so I can get rid of my fabric scraps. It's amazing how many boxes of scraps I have.
And I just can't "throw them out". No way! They are still good for something. A quilt, a rug - I hate to throw out fabric. It can always be made into something else - even if there is only a little bit of it.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 10:51 PM
Until morale improves! Dammit!
Sort of seems to be the theme around here. LOL! Ah, yes, but since it is the Holidays most of the "beaters" are mercifully GONE. The "beatees" (or "inmates" as some call us) are now running the asylum. And it is wonderful.
No one calling, emailing, barging into the office demanding I drop everything and do what they want right this minute before the DIE on the spot. People think I'm crazy for working the holidays. HA! It's peaceful and quiet and I can actually get stuff DONE.
Besides, why would I want to sit at home when it's freezing cold as hell? As if. I'll spend my vaca in the summer when I can be outside playing and wreaking havoc. Geez, don't you people know ANYTHING?
Being here alone IS a vacation! From YOU! LOL!
I wanted to go skating today at lunch but I'm still cold. And I'll have to eat before I go (if I want to get something from the cafeteria). I don't like eating before I skate. It's gross. I have to wait at least 2 hours. I guess I could just not eat at all but then I'd get bitchier around 4pm. Ah, well.
I need to practice, tho. In a bad way. I've only gotten to hit the ice once a week for the past two weeks and I'm bummed about it. Maybe I'll just bite the bullet, skate then grab some fast food on the way back. Altho I hate to. But it's better than going hungry.
Hopefully the ice won't be too crowded and I can work on my figures for my test in March. I really need to take that test - just to see where I am. I haven't tested in about two years and that's bogus.
Oh, I finally broke down and ordered me an mp3 player. I think I might have already said that, tho. It hasn't come yet. And I'm still waiting on a T-shirt for mom to arrive. If it doesn't it's no big deal. All my shopping is done and I only have like 3 more things to wrap. HA!
No panic. I rather like this shop by catalog/internet. Saves me a TON of hassle. And headache.
And today is the winter solstice. Get out and light the candles, bonfires, etc. to make sure the sun comes back! Shortest day of the year and if we don't appease the great red ball in the sky we may never see it again. Or so they say.
Doing a lot of thinking lately. Nothing I care to discuss. While some people may give voice to their darkest secrets in their blog I prefer to keep my most private thoughts private. I know people read eventho they might not comment. And sometimes things can rise up at a later date to bite you on the butt.
So for now I'll just say I've been thinking about being a "girl" again and how much I hated it when I was younger. I don't hate it as much now but it still feels very weird. It is not comfortable for me to be female. Strange as that sounds.
Maybe because I was raised with boys, I dunno.
All I DO know is that I want a nap. It's cold and dark and my feet are warm. I should be napping. Somewhere on a nice warm beach would be perfect.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 10:23 AM
I had every intention of going to the gym tonight after work. Until Aunt Flo smacked me full force. Oh, it hurts! My back. The nausea. The cramps. Ugh. It beats the hell outta the alternative, tho.
Sometimes it's bad. Most of the time not. Only when I'm a day or two late it really gets painful. Like now. I guess the ol' bod figured I was recouperating too quickly from my tangle with the ice.
Damn. Last week I was so very sore. My butt is still sore on the bottom. I took a couple of hard falls and could hardly sit down for a few days. Ouch!
Since I didn't hit the gym, I did some laundry and some present wrapping. Also bought a mp3 player. I was gonna wait until after the holiday - damn near everything is sold out. But good ol' ebay had a few. So I got one.
The selling point was I could put books on tape on it. Yay for more language lessons! And it will be nice to have at the gym instead of carrying around the CD player that skips.
This weekend Steve bought himself some new toys. I finally got a DVD player. Yeah, I know. I'm behind the times. Still haven't hooked it up yet. Probably get around to it sometime next week or so.
I think I'm going to pick up The Creature on Friday and keep him until Christmas. So I can love on him - the poor mistreated thing! HA!
Probably go to bed early tonight since I don't feel too good. I hate cramps. Ugh.
And I still need to finish Mr. Wicked's story. Things have gotten pretty quiet around AFF lately. I'm thinking the holidays have pretty well occupied everyone. But I wanted to get this done before Christmas so I'd best get on the ball.
It just feels so odd ending it without him here. Like admitting he's really gone. WTF is up with me being in denial? I wanted him gone, didn't I?
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 6:33 PM
It's getting rather close to Christmas, right? I mean there's what - eight shopping days left? So every night after work for the past two weeks I've had things to do. I don't come dragging in until about 7 or so.
Apparently no one else has errands to run or anything. I've been getting calls from various people about 6pm wondering where I am. Uh, out. If I'm at practice I don't get off the ice until 6 or a little after. If I'm at the gym I'm not leaving until about 7pm or so.
And, depending on where I have to go I'm not going to get home until late. And when I get home there's MORE work to do - dishes, laundry, wrapping gifts and getting things ready for the next day. Which means I'm probably tired and hungry by the time I finally get around to listening to my messages.
So today I call home, right? My mother doesn't want to talk to me because some stupid TV show is on. Whatever. Then I proceed to get into a 20 minute argument with my dad on why fucking Walmart won't change my fucking tire.
It's a long ugly story that boils down to - he flatly refuses to believe that this busted rim of mine is busted. No one will touch it or put it on my car. I don't WANT it on my car. Why do I have to argue with him about it?
I finally said, "look - what part of 'they aren't doing it' are you not understanding?"
He says, "I understand they won't put it on. Why not?"
I just got fed up and said, "Look, why don't YOU take it in there and argue with them? I'm tired of trying to tell you. They won't do, I can't MAKE them do it and I'm sick and tired of people thinking I can MAKE any one DO anything."
Fukcing pisses me off. What the fuck is wrong with people? Do I look like some fucking omnipotent being? No. The only thing I can remotely manipulate is the space-time continuum.
I cannot MAKE fucking idiots do their damned jobs. I cannot MAKE WalMart fix a tire. I cannot MAKE stupid people comprehend "no". I cannot. So why in the fuck to people think I can? GAH!
And why in the hell do children STARE at me? I mean fucking STARE. It's weird and kinda creepy. I mean they just stop what they are doing and watch me. I could be pushing a shopping cart, minding my own business and I feel their beady eyes on me - probing me.
I'll look around and, sure enough! There's some child, mouth all agape, staring wide-eyed at me like I'm some sort of bizarre creature. All kinds of kids. Usually under the age of 7, tho. The only thing I can figure is it's the red hair or they can see me in all of my djinn glory. Who knows? Weird as hell, tho. And unnerving.
And, on the heels of my last bitch, get this. Today was our department holiday party but I had a doctor appointment at lunch and had to miss it.
So, after it's over I go wandering in to the "party room" looking for some cheese or a leftover veggie tray to munch on. I figure I'll eat some carrot sticks and grab a couple of crackers, right?
Well, all that was left was candy and cookies. Ick. I look around and say "aren't there any vegetables left over? Or crackers?" Hey, I wasn't asking for much.
Then Mark says, "you can have this ham."
"OK," I say. "A piece of ham would work."
"No," he says. "You have to take the whole thing. Not just a piece."
"I don't want a whole ham!"
"You have to take the whole ham if you want a piece. We ordered too many. I have to get rid of them," he says and shoves an entire ham at me.
WTF?? OK. I take the ham.
Then, as I'm walking out holding this ham I didn't ask for, one of the individuals who USUALLY does things like take entire pizzas demands to know "how did YOU get that?"
I just shrugged. She probably wouldn't have believed me, anyway. Jealous bitch.
After work I have to go to the store and pick up some odds and ends. It was trying. I had wanted to go to the gym after I got out of the store but it was late and I was tired. My shoe was coming apart and bothering my foot so I said, "the hell with it."
All I wanted to do was come home, wrap some presents and relax. Instead I get into an argument with my dad over a stupid fucking tire because he won't believe me.
You know, I'm just sick of this bullshit. I get this shit every fucking day at work. If someone refuses to do their job, WTF do you think *I* can do about it? I'd LIKE to shoot them or, at the very least, fire their idiotic asses but I can't.
If I ask someone to do something - ANYTHING - and they refuse guess what? I can't MAKE them do it. You people need to fucking DEAL with it. Or, better yet, go bitch at them YOURSELF. I'm tired of being the fucking go-between getting my ass chewed by both sides.
I don't fucking CARE if that lazy motherfucker in KTC won't do his fucking job. I'll put HIS name in the blanks.
I don't fucking CARE that Walmart won't change my tire out. I'll go somewhere else.
Bitching at ME because *I* can't MAKE someone do what YOU want them to is not helping. You're either part of the solution or you're part of the problem. If you don't take your bitching to the proper person, you're just part of the problem.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 10:05 PM
I've got about a half hour before I have to put in an appearance at the company "holiday party". OK. Whatever. I have the chess game loaded on the Palm Pilot so I'm good to go. I won't fall asleep at a critical moment.
There are several people in my building who are just total assholes and I feel the need to call them out on it. Just because I think they're fucktards.
First - one manager who changes departments like I change underwear. The truth is no one can stand him. HIS manager actually LEFT her last job because of him being such an asshole.
This asshole seems to think that "visitor parking" means him. He parks his fucking vanity-plated convertible BMW in the visitor lot every damned day because his fucking lazy ass doesn't want to walk from the employee lot.
Hell, just driving the BMW alone says "asshole" but his behavior re-inforces it. He uses the freakin' FIRE EXITS so he doesn't have to walk that far to the visitor lot!
He does nothing but push paper and "underlings" do his work. And, let me tell you, he makes sure you know YOU are an "underling". A total asshole who believes he's better than everyone else but couldn't actually DO anything if his life depended on it. Initials - VBL.
Asshole #2 - the reason I hate many str8 men (generally). Fat (yes, qualifies as "obese"), ugly, hairy as fuck. Stupid, lazy and mysognistic. Incapable of actually working on his own. Needs constant baby-sitting. Never seems to do anything other than wander the halls and talk to his equally lazy "buddies".
Married with a kid. Bitches about his wife's weight. WTF? Take a look in the mirror, Free Willy!
Thinks he's "all that" and the company would go belly up without him. Yeah. Like we'd even notice your lard ass gone. *eye roll* Initials - BL (No, not the same person as Asshole #1 but they are easy to confuse!)
Asshole #3 - this is more of a contingent than anything. The women in the labs who think that leftover food from meetings/retirements/holiday activities means they don't have to cook for a week. They steal every friggin' thing they can get their greedy grasping hands on - literally taking entire boxes of pizzas, cakes or anything else they can find.
What the hell, people? I KNOW you are making enough $$ to feed yourself AND your family.
And since WHEN did it become OK to act like starving trailer trash? Maybe someone ELSE would like a piece of pizza or cake. Show some class and manners, you heathen hordes! There's no reason to run down the hall shoving people out of the way so you can steal an entire can of fruit cocktail.
Sometimes I think these assholes steal food just because it's there. Not because they want it or even like it. Fucking idiots. RUDE idiots.
I was trying to push a cart down the hall yesterday and the swarming vultures were fighting over the carcass of a discarded box of candy. I had to literally SHOUT at them to get them to move their fat asses out of the way so I could get the cart by.
They stood there looking at me like "if I move out of your way I won't get that piece of candy and die on the spot!"
Bitches, please. SOME of us actually have WORK to do - you know - so we can stay in business and get paid?
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 9:43 AM
Ah! I have finished my holiday baking. Hurray! It has taken me 7 hours but it is finally done!
The carnage - 6lbs of chocolate, 3lbs powdered sugar, 2lbs peanut butter and several unfortunate gingerbread men.
Also about 10 rolls of Lifesavers candy in an experiment gone horribly wrong. But it was still quite interesting and it might come in handy later on.
I made me some gingerbread. I like gingerbread. Sometimes people make it too strong but this turned out really well. I tried a new recipe.
Well, I was gonna try it but I didn't have one of the ingredients so I just substituted what I thought would work chemically. And it turned out pretty good! Who says hanging with the ChemE's doesn't rub off? LOL!
Yesterday I finally got the oil changed in the car but they couldn't fix the tire. Bogus. So I still need to get that taken care of.
Now I'm rather tired and just sitting here watching Law & Order. The dishes are soaking in the sink. Most of them are done except for the bigger bowls. But now that I'm sitting down and it feels so good that I don't want to get up.
I still need to get the Christmas stuff out. I'd like to go thru it and get rid of stuff I don't use anymore but I just don't feel like it. Maybe tomorrow. If I feel up to it.
Yesterday I also ordered my new glasses. Finally. I've had this pair for 4 years I realized. My prescription hasn't changed much in that time which is good news. They should be in before the holiday. Yay!
Not much else going on here. Or I'm just too tired to remember. Oh, Steve's quilt is done. Finally. It's gigantic and heavy as hell. I've got enough fabric scraps left to make another one. I might do that in a month or two.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 11:35 PM
Michelle stopped by this morning and was asking me about The Creature. Seems her friend just got a Pekingese pup and she was thinking of getitng one. So we started talking about Ug. Now he's going to be on my mind all day.
I'm not quite sure how old he is and I don't care. He'll always be my precious baby. It was mine and dad's idea to get him. After Cris died we wanted another Peke. Mom didn't want one. Crissy was HER baby.
So we got Ug. On Mother's Day several years ago. He rode home in the backseat of my truck with dad. His first two weeks away from his moma he lived with me. He was housebroken when he went home to my parents.
He housebroke himself. He would dig in this one empty flower pot I had and throw dirt everywhere. Not that I minded. It didn't have anything in it but dirt. And he was so small (about 3 lbs) that he fit in there perfectly. He would use that flower pot as his "litter box".
While I was at work he would listen to baseball games on am radio. I called him "bambino" since he didn't have a name yet.
Now he is much older - his lil' face and chin is all white and the white is even starting to go around his eyes. But he still runs around the house like a mad thing when I come to visit him.
He has so much hair between the pads on his feet that I have to trim it periodically. It looks so weird when I do - the hair makes his feet look a lot bigger than they are. I call him "grinch feet" when his foot hairs get too long. He has several colorful names like that.
When he's excited, he'll lick you to death and always tries to lick your nose. Ew. If you aren't paying him enough attention when you come to visit he'll bark at you. When I come in I always have to chase him then love on him BEFORE I'm "allowed" to hug my parents. Unless, of course, I want to jerk his chain. Then I ignore him. LOL! Then I get the "mom, make her pay attention to me" bark.
Like a baby, he has several different barks depending on what he wants. One when he wants your attention (I want out, I'm hungry); another for "hey, I want to play"; one for "Somebody's in the yard/at the door!"; his "I'm going to kill it" bark when he's in attack mode; one when he's pissed because you're ignoring him;one when he's scared and one for when he's playing (this is usually accompanied by copious amounts of growling and snarling).
He also does this odd thing that we call "trilling". It sounds like a purr. When he's excited or happy he does this. It's a very strange noise. It probably should be a growl but it sounds like purring.
When you give him a treat that he wants to "save for later" he will hide it somewhere in the house. But before he gets to actually hiding the thing, he will walk around for a while with the treat in his mouth whining as he searches for a place to hide it. Usually you have to tell him a few times that "I don't see it" before he decides to drop it in plain sight next to a door or a wall. That is just weird.
He snores like a lumberjack. Only 13 lbs but man, can he snore! And he dreams. When he does he whines and barks in his sleep. Every now and then he'll wake himself up and doesn't realize it was HIM making the noise. Then he'll let out this "WTF?" bark that scares the piss outta you.
He did that to me ONCE when I was in a dead sound sleep. You wanna talk about shock! I went from sound sleep to on my feet and wide awake in a split second. It wasn't until later I realized what he had done. Now that I know what he's doing I always try to wake him up when I hear him start whining. I know what's coming.
Mom has pulled the curtains back in her computer room so he can lay on the arm of the couch and stare out the window. He loves that. He's such a busy body. If he sees one of the neighbors he'll bark once then look at you. If you don't acknowledge him or what he sees, he'll do that again. One bark. Until you pay attention.
Then you have to go over to him and look out the window or you can just say "I see it" and he's ok. He'll let out one last "humph" but he won't bark again. Until he sees something else. Then the ritual starts all over again. Fortunately, he only barks at humans or other dogs.
And he always has to know where everyone is and what they are doing. If you want to drive him batty just go into a room and lock him out. He HATES that! He has this internal timer or something. You can leave and go into another room for about 7 minutes. If you don't reappear where he can see you in that time, he comes looking for you.
When everyone is upstairs, he will lay right in the middle of the doorway so he can keep an eye on all the rooms. He hides under the Christmas tree, too. He has a cardboard box in the family room that he sleeps in. Mom had a bed for him but he prefers the box - he likes to be "hidden".
Dad has bought him so many toys it's disgusting. But his favorite is one of my old houseshoes. LOL! I dunno why he loves this thing but it's his most favored toy and the one he always wants to play with.
Someone (I can't remember WHO) gave him this squeak toy that was a corncob. He LOVES squeaky toys but he HATES that corncob with a PASSION! It is the funniest thing! Just thinking about it makes me laugh.
If you get it out (we keep it well-hidden usually)and squeak it he will go berserk! He seems to be terrified of this thing for some reason. You can chase him around the house with it. He'll bark incessantly at it. And if you throw it, he'll run after it but stand there and bark at it. And I mean BARK. LOUD and long. When you get tired of listening to his barking and take the thing away, he'll KEEP barking.
If you put the corncob up on the counter, he will run to the counter and bark. If you put it on top of the refrigerator he will run to the refrigerator and bark. It cracks me the hell up but mom gets pissed. Of course, me and my bro drag this thing out periodically to torment the both of them. Hey - two tormented for the price of one - you can't beat THAT! LOL!
He's scared of thunderstorms. Unless he's at my place. Then he doesn't seem to notice.
He LOVES to go for rides in the car. If dad puts a hat on the dog will run down the hallway growling. He thinks dad is going somewhere and HE will get to go, too. Sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn't. We usually take him to the drive thrus (so he can be a busy body outside of the house). And if you open a car door near him - look out! He'll jump right in.
The mailman likes him and he likes the mail man. I find this amusing. But he usually likes everyone (the dog - I dunno about the mailman).
Except kids. He's scared of kids for some reason. Not that he bites or anything - he just hides from them. I don't quite understand why. Maybe because he's not used to being around them.
Since he doesn't have a snout he tends to blow a lot of snot everywhere. And he's got an underbite. It looks really funny when his teeth get caught on his dewlaps like he is here.
That's pretty much what he looks like most of the time. Ears up, tail up and teeth sticking out in every direction. Isn't he so adorable? I just want to scoop him up and kiss him all over his flat lil' face!
I think I might have to exercise my "visitation rights" and take him over the holidays. That way he'll be out of mom's hair for a while. Of course, I don't feed him off of the table or let him get away with dictating MY schedule like they do. His furry butt straightens right up at my place! HA!
I tell him repeatedly "I have the opposible thumb. You do not. Therefore, I, not you, run this household." LOL! Of course he doesn't like it but what can he do? Not a damned thing.
But he is very smart. I'd almost be a bit concerned if he DID somehow manage to grow an opposible thumb. He'd be quite the terror then. o_O
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 9:10 AM
The hated snow. It's coming down like a mother out there. And not a salt truck to be seen. Amazing. It's not like they didn't know it was coming. I knew this morning when I listened to the news.
Surprisingly, tho, traffic was moving ok when I went to the doctor. Just the normal delays at the exit/on ramps. No big deal. After I got out of the doc, tho, that was another story. Like 2" had fallen while I was in there. And I wasn't in there more than an hour and a half.
But I went home the back way and that wasn't bad. Now it's getting ugly, tho. I'm glad I'm not out in it.
All the hicks are going berserk. They're rushing out to the stop and rob to buy cigs, milk, bread and ho-ho's. Idiots. Act like they're going to be snowed in for YEARS. As if.
I have bread and diet coke so I'm good for a few weeks. And I can always WALK to the store. It might be a long walk but still - it's not a big deal. But I DO need to get stuff to make the Christmas candy. I'll do that this weekend.
The other day AFF went down and ate my last chapter as well as the reviews for it. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why in the hell this site is so unreliable. It goes down once every quarter and chews up shit. I dunno why they can't fix the damned thing! Aaaaahhhhhh! So I had to repost but I lost the reviews.
I need to finish these last chapters up, too. I'm almost done. Does it sound odd to say that I'll be rather sad to end this? It seems strange. And since he's vanished . . . well, this would be a good opportunity to complete his story without his "meddling". LOL!
The Christmas shopping is pretty well done. Let someone else fight the traffic - I'll mail checks and make phone calls. Someone can DELIVER stuff to me.
Still haven't managed to get my tire fixed or the oil changed. Hopefully I'll be able to do it tomorrow. They should have the roads cleared off by then.
I finally got the Christmas cards and bills out today. Yay! One less thing to do. I might actually not be pulling my hair out as the holidays approach! WTF?? That is certainly a sign of the apocalypse!
Well, I had the CUTEST picture of Ug with Santa but I can't seem to find it on my hard drive. He is soooooo CUTE! I like to scoop him up and kiss on him. He usually gets disgusted with me and hides behind mom (the dog, not santa). I'll post it when I find it.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 5:53 PM
Today's high temp - 24F. WTF?? Like it's so cold we're going to be switching to the Kelvin scale here shortly.
What the hell is the point of having temperatures below 25F? WHAT? There is no point. The ground freezes and kills all the mosquitos, the ponds freeze over so you can skate on them. There's absolutely NO REASON whatsoever that the temperature needs to get below 25F.
The sad thing is it'll get COLDER. Like down below ZERO F. There should be some sort of law against that bullshit. Hate the cold, I do. Hate talking like yoda, too. o_O
I finally remembered what I'm supposed to do on Thursday - I have to go get an eye exam. It's been about 2 years and my glasses are shot. So are my eyes. It's hell getting up in years and long in the tooth, you know? The older I get the worse I hate the cold. Makes me all stiff.
Sadly, the rink is actually warmer than being outside. The inside temp there is about 40F. Once I get warmed up I usually end up skating in a T-shirt and a pair of sweats. So you know it can't be THAT cold.
Steve got me a heated seat cushion for the car that plugs into the lighter. God, that's awesome! My butt gets all nice and warm! Mmmmmm!
Still need to get my tire fixed. And now I need an oil change. I should do that this week if I can. Maybe Thursday if my eye exam doesn't take too long. Or maybe tonight after I give blood. I dunno. I hate to do it on Friday because everything will be jammed. And cold.
Funny stuff -- Today I get an email from Steve (yes, I'm talking about you!). He's in Minnesota. Last night he went to the Mall of America and said that they have a lot of the same stores as any other mall but they have "the biggest Dicks I've seen". Oh, man, I nearly fell out laughing. Of course, he was talking about the SPORTING GOODS STORE but still. It didn't come out that way.
Just like when I mentioned to Kim that I was "robbing Peter to pay Paul" and she came back with "well, I don't have any Peter to rob." It wasn't until I cracked up that she realized what she had said.
OK - yes, I'm easily amused, I admit it. And my mind usually swims in the gutter but hey - we can't all be terrified fundies, can we? LOL!
More amusement - one poster on a messageboard refered to out of control children as "crack addled macaques". I had to hide in the bathroom at work for 20 minutes before I could stop laughing about that. It still makes me giggle when I think of it. All these macaques at the zoo going berserk.
Ah, yes. I guess I'd better get to work. Or writing. There was a meeting today on Canadian regulations but I'm skipping it. I think I might fall asleep. Besides, I need to do some other stuff.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 12:07 PM
And it's freezing cold. I really hate this infernal weather.
It's safe to buy electronics now - Mercury is no longer in retrograde. To usher in this change of events I've done a bunch of shopping (on line, of course!) today. HA!
I hate shopping and the crowds so bad - I've ordered most of my stuff out of catalogues or on the web. Let someone ELSE fight the friggin' traffic and snow and morons who can't drive.
Only a few things left to get. And some little things. I might pick those up tomorrow or later this week. I dunno yet. Tomorrow I have to give blood. Wednesday is practice. Thursday I might stop somewhere. Or maybe not. I'd like to get Steve's quilt finished before Christmas. I've only got one side left to sew but I tend to procrastinate.
And I still have to make candy and that for mom. That should only take me one day but still - it will be a full day of nothing but baking and making.
I'm thinking that I don't even want to put the tree up this year. It's such a pain in the butt. I might put up some decorations but ah - we'll see.
This past weekend I went to see The Creature. He was very glad to see me. Foolishly he jumped up into dad's rocking chair and growled at me. So I started rocking the chair really fast and everytime he tried to jump out, I'd push him back and keep rocking until he just leapt on me to escape.
Then we ran around the house - him barking and growling and me shouting that I was going to "get him". This is one of our rituals. Mom says I'm the only one who chases him anymore. Huh! He likes it. He usually runs into every room of the house (and expects ME to follow him).
Last night I had a hard time sleeping for some reason. I think it's because 1)I haven't been eating enough veggies and 2)I haven't been getting enough exercise. Bad girl! But I did go into work early. So I was at least productive.
Tonight I went to practice. Everyone is getting on everyone else's nerves. There's the Christmas Ice Show coming up and everyone wants to do their program and the ice is crowded. It's rather crazy. I'm not doing the show. No reason for it. And I need to get my skates sharpened. I should do that after practice on Wednesday. They really need it.
I haven't been able to practice my violin lately and that makes me sad. I think I may practice tonight. I still haven't gotten any peg drops to keep the pegs from slipping on it. I can probably pick some up at Guitar Center sometime.
Just trying to keep warm. Gotta send out the Christmas cards this week. They are sitting here, staring at me accussingly. I guess I should get on that.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 7:12 PM
Last night I had practice. First day back on the ice in a week (since Vegas). We do spins. I love to spin. It's a lot of fun but it's also a lot of work - makes me more tired than jumping actually.
Anyway - we were supposed to practice for my test and we ended up going from spins to double salchows. I have to laugh at this. I did a couple of singles then we went right into the doubles. I think she forgets that I'm older than she is sometimes. Not that I mind - I just think it's funny. And I'm rather pleased with myself that I am physically capable and good enough as a skater to go right from warmup to doubles. Forgive my bit of braggin' there.
It's not like I actually land vertically, mind you. But I AM getting up and getting the rotation. My timing is off and I'm not leading with my FEET. Once I get the hang of it I should be ok.
And it makes my butt really sore. Not only from landing on it but from scrunching it up. It's a lot of effort to jump like that. Especially coming off a week hiatus - I'm pretty darn sore on the backside. And I managed to kick myself in the shin again. Didn't cut myself this time, tho. Just got a bit of a bruise.
I wanted to go skating again tonight but mom called and wants me to deliver her cell phone. She stuck the damned thing under the front seat of my car and forgot it. Now she realizes it's gone and wants me to deliver it to her. Like she uses it! They have a land line. And they aren't going anywhere. WTF?
So I had planned on going home tonight to drop off the phone and give my baby love and didn't bring my skates. But, alas, the dreaded snow has arrived. Yes, people. It's fucking snowing. UGH. It bites the big hairy one. That means I'm not going anywhere. Hey, it's not ME that can't drive or is afraid to drive in the snow. It's all the IDIOTS out there who suddenly think they can only go 20mph on the interstate. If you're that afraid of it, stay the fuck home!
But no, they have to run to the mall! God forbid they wait another day to get to the mall when they can clog up traffic NOW! Morons. I do my Xmas shopping thru catalogs. Let someone ELSE fight the traffic and snow.
Speaking of shopping. My Xmas wish list is simple (as it is EVERY year!)lol!
1)chinchilla coat. I've already tried it on and it is beautiful. Of course, I will settle for red fox if necessary. LOL!
2)A
Shelby. Preferably an "original" and not a "kit".
3)
The Big O (of course! Altho I'd prefer him above the coat and the Shelby, truth be told!
)
4) With a side order of
this.
And, finally I'd like a double Axel. To hell with that stupid single. Gimme a double.
I mean really - if you're gonna ask for something - ASK for what you really want! LOL! All anyone can say is "you're on dope. You ain't getting that!" LOL!
It never hurts to ask!
Yaaaaarrrrr!
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 3:50 PM
