Happy Halloween!
Yes - it's that time of year when I get to be my bad self and everyone thinks it's just for fun. Well, what do they know around here, right?
Most people are looking at me like I'm nuts but I don't care. If the bad hoo-doo gets you don't come crying to ME. Dig?
I'm still feelin' the hurt from Saturday night. Ugh. But I had a lot of fun. It was a little colder than I would have liked - of course, laying on the bathroom floor half the night probably didn't HELP my body temperature! LOL!
Ah, yes. So Steve was agreeable and took me up to the street party near where he lives. I looked hideous. And it was great. Dressed up as the Wicked Witch of the West (appropriately). Green paint EVERYWHERE. Spray painted the hair gray - it was so horrible it looked (and FELT) like a cheap wig. Even had the fake warty nose and chin! It was GREAT!
I was ugly as hell, too. Couldn't even stand to look at myself in the mirror! LOL! The only bad part was I couldn't drink anything because the nose and chin kept getting in the way! I had to take a straw with me in order to be able to drink anything! LOL!
It was really neat walking around seeing all the costumes. Some of them were pretty good. There were a LOT of "batmans" running around. And, of course, all of the girls had to wear as little clothing as possible. WTF is up with THAT? One is not supposed to be and "angel" or a "princess" for Halloween you ninnies! You're supposed to be something SCARY! Hello! Humph!
I lost my poor chin about halfway thru the night. It was loose from where I kept laughing. I kept having to stick it back on. About midnight or so we went to a club with another friend of ours.
It was rather dead there for some odd reason. But no matter - I got to sing and dance and act a fool.
And then somewhere - in the midsts of my inebriated brain a voice said, "you must have the tequila". So, of course, I did! Dumb, dumb dumb. Why do I listen? I should have said, "fuck that!" and had a diet coke. But no.
Alas, that was my downfall. The belly said "WTF is this? I don't like it - it's outta here!"
But you know - I still managed to tell someone where I was going, calmly find the can, pull my hair back, situate myself comfortably before the porcelain god and patiently wait for the inevitible. Then I was fine. For the most part.
Later when we got home I decided that "you know - I don't think I want all this stuff in my system anymore 'cause I'm going to get sick later. Let's just speed this process up a bit." It was finger down the throat time. Made poor Steve ill so he left me to my own devices which was fine.
I managed to smear green facepaint all over his toilet and bathtub. Ew! Then I nearly froze to death on the floor. (I have a very very low tolerance to the cold).
Finally, Steve decided that the only way to get me warm was to put me in a hot bath. Now, mind you it's about 5am (I think). So we get into the tub and I'm bleeding green and black paint everywhere. But I'm finally warm. Poor guy is covered in green and black paint and his tub is a mess.
Out of the tub I'm bundled in long johns, socks, shoes, a tshirt and a sweatshirt. Then under 3 blankets. Ah! Finally warm.
About 6 hours later I awaken. If that's what you want to call it. I moan piteously and crawl shaking to the bathroom. Must brush teeth! I'm still intoxicated and paying a heavy price for my foolishness.
I manage to take a shower, wash my hair (it was full of white temporary paint)and get the last bits of green and black from me. That was my entire effort for the day. I crawled back into bed only partaking of the Pepto Bismol. Pathetic. And I was shaking from the tequila. That stuff always gives me the shakes for some reason. Even if I only have one or two shots. Weird.
It's fair to say I was pretty miserable yesterday. A few crackers, a little water (the belly was still angry with me about the whole alcohol thing)and lots of Pepto.
Today I've still got a touch of a headache - I think I just may be dehydrated. I'm hiding out right now. There's some bigwig here who's trying to round up everyone for lunch - "come listen to me blab at lunch ye underlings!" But I don't want to go. It's another one of those pointless things. More rah rah crap and nothing ever improves for US.
Apparently if you're caught in the hallway by the sea hag you're told you HAVE to go and they expect you to show up. But I'm hiding. I've got a lot of things to do today and I can't get stuck there. But I have to wait a little longer to make sure the coast is clear.
Tonight I'm going to put my nose and chin back on and head up to mom and dads to pass out candy or walk around. The dog is going to go nuts. HA! My camera battery died so I couldn't get a picture of myself.
Somehow in the course of the evening's events I ended up with a green feather boa. How I managed this I haven't a clue. But it seemed to match the color of my skin! LOL!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 11:05 AM
You know, it's a sad day when one cannot confess all of their secrets if they were so inclined.
I hate stupid SUVs. Those people act like they own the whole road with their gas guzzling pieces of shit. Really.
And WTF is up with these idiots who think they have to yap on a fucking cell phone while they "attempt" to drive? It should be legal to shoot those bastards on sight. Just think how long we survived without those damned things. I think you can wait another 15 minutes to pull over and stop being a fucking ROAD HAZARD!
Work is ok. The sea hag is gone so I'm running amok. Why not? I made my office mate a fall screen saver. The poor thing tried to download one off the internet and it reset her homepage. So we fixed that and downloaded some pix and got it going. I was quite impressed with some of the amateur pix out there - very pretty colors and scenes. She likes it and that's all that matters.
How bad is it there? Well, I've lost 5 lbs by not eating because I'm too upset so I think that's a problem. Yeah. Not that I MIND losing 5lbs (I could stand to lose about 15! lol!) it's just the way it's happening.
Today I get this call from our downtown office - seems this stuff I ordered like a month ago turned up at THEIR dock. WTF? Wonderful DHL split my shipment when it got to the US and only 6 boxes out of 60 made it to me. The rest of them floated around aimlessly for THREE FRIGGIN' WEEKS before they wound up downtown.
Everyone down there was freaking out because it's like "classified" stuff and they don't know who it belongs to. Seems somehow DHL lost the address or replaced the address on the boxes - I don't know. Finally today we (the shipment and I) found each other. But I have to drive downtown to get it tomorrow.
Hey - it's a good excuse to visit my favorite store - Mahatma - and pick up some incense and see what's new. And I'll have lunch down there before it's back to the salt mines. Long lunch for me tomorrow. Woo hoo! Who's gonna stop me? I have to pick up a very important shipment! HA!
Mom wants me to make travel arrangements for Vegas over Thanksgiving. I need to get on that, too. It's getting a bit late.
Monday is the holiday. I think I may take off Tuesday morning since I'm going to be out and about Monday night. Told mom I might come up and go trick-or-treating again this year. LOL! Hey - believe it or not I can PASS for a kid (when I'm dressed in costume). Kids are so dang BIG nowadays that I look YOUNG in comparison!
Besides, dad likes to get the candy. HE usually sends me out to the neighbors to trade candy and I just keep going. It's so much fun. I don't eat any of the stuff I get - I just like walking around the neighborhood seeing everyone's houses made up and seeing all the kids' costumes!
Then I take my "loot" back to my parents and let them fight over it. If I get anything non-candy (like a popcorn ball or a can of pop) then that's mine. Even The Creature gets in on the action. He loves those peanut butter chewies. Of course, he doesn't GET a whole one - just a bite - but he goes crazy for those things.
I got invited to a Halloween party this weekend. I had intended on going but, alas, someone wants to see me this weekend and doesn't want to go. But I flatly REFUSE to sit at home like a bump on a log on the biggest party weekend of the year. Fuck that. I'm going out. You're either with me or against me. If you're with me then fine - we can go find a party. If you're not then don't try to guilt me into giving up some WELL DESERVED FUN.
Me needs to let off some steam by beating up on Captain Morgan and I will not be denied! Confound it all!
I just don't understand why some people have to make everything so fucking complicated. It's Halloween weekend. People are going to be OUT in costume. It's great! I love to see how creative some people are with their costumes. It's like some strange parade. I look forward to this all year (much like Pennsic) and I want to enjoy it. I do not want to sit a home watching TV.
It still mystifies me how some people would rather sit at home and watch TV than go LIVE something for them selves. Crazy.
Mr. Wicked has been a naughty boy lately. He seems to have figured out the sea hag is gone so he's been tormenting me at work. Ah - it's ok, tho. He's not being too hateful or demanding. Just showing up and breathing down my neck or purring in my ear at odd moments. It's actually quite amusing.
Several of my co-workers have said things like "what are you grinning about?" I just shrug. What can I say? "There's a disembodied elf blowing in my ear?" Riiiiiiight.
Ah, now here is an adorable picture of the Big O taking a nappy-poo under a table with his doggy.
Isn't that so cute? Poor baby curled up in a little dew ball. All he had to do was call me and I would have GLADLY provided my nice soft lap for his precious head! And even some doggy treats for Sidi!
But no - he still insists on tormenting me from afar. Teasing this old lady with his chocolate eyes and vanilla smile. Oh, you'll get yours, mister!
You can run but you cannot hide! One day my greedy harpy claws will sink into your soft yielding flesh and I shall have you! I shall have my way with you! Oh, yes I will! Your pathetic pleas for mercy and pitiful cries of terror will fall upon deaf ears! No one will come to save you from the rogue goddess! NO ONE!
And when I have taken my fill of you there will be naught left but an empty husk! You will be scarred for life! A quivering, blubbering shadow of your former self. You will rue the day you thought you could tease me with those dimples and remain unscathed by my undying LUST!
So there!
I'm so glad I got that out. *whew*
Now riddle me this, Batman. What sort of dude has never heard the term "grudge fuck"? o_O I mean, really! That's such an old expression. At least *I* thought it was. Then the dude asks me to explain it. HUH? Exactly what it sounds like, dude! LOL! Try it sometime! Heeee!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 6:48 PM
Saturday night I'm sitting here sewing and flipping thru channels, right? Well, I stumble upon "Worlds Scariest Places." Now I know better than to watch this because I'm a chicken shit.
This is common knowledge among my family and friends. If anyone takes me to a scary movie or if I watch anything scary on TV I have to have someone stay with me or sleep with the lights on. Sadly even at MY age I still have nightmares if I watch horror movies.
Most of the "classics" I've never seen because I CAN'T watch them. None of the "Friday the 13th" movies. NONE. Only the original "Halloween" with Jamie Lee Curtis. None of the "Nightmare on Elm Streets" no "Exorcist", no "Amityville Horror" - nothing like that. Altho I DID see "Rosemary's Baby" like a million years ago. (Believe it or not, I had nightmares about "Wild Wild West" when I saw that. And not just because it was bad, either).
I can't see these things and I KNOW this. So why in the hell - it's a cold and rainy night and I'm alone - do I sit here and watch "World Most Scariest Places"? I dunno. Maybe 'cause not only am I a chicken shit - I'm a DUMB chicken shit!
So I end up watching all of these and I'm so damned scared I have to turn on the lights to sleep. I'm pathetic. Then I'm laying there thinking "oh my GOD! I hope my cousin didn't see this! She'd probably volunteer US to do something like this!"
Hey - if they did (because in these particular shows, they would take a family and drop them in someplace like Transylvania and put cameras on them and send them out - ALONE - into various areas of the place that were "haunted") - they'd have to bleep out every sentence I uttered. Especially if something got "weird". There would be a stream of "colorful metaphors" issuing forth from my lips that would cause even Sailor Jerry to blush!
Tonight I'm back to "Law and Order" and "Cold Case Files". This I can handle.
Work this week should be ok. The sea hag is gone so I can run amok. I'm going to apply for several jobs while she is gone. I talked to my team leader last week and he's like "well, she doesn't want you to leave."
Uhm, yeah. Too late. She doesn't want me to leave because it will look bad on HER. Let's not kid ourselves. And with Kim leaving on DB she'll need someone to dump all the work on. Not happening again. Find someone else.
A bit of good news today. I paid my car off! Yay! Quite a pleasant surprise I must say! Oh, and I got invited to a Halloween party this weekend. Sweet! I have no idea what I will go as, tho. Hmmmmm.
I'm slowly learning to read music but not like one would think. When I see a certain note it means to me "this finger there" and not a letter like a# or something like that. But that's ok. It works.
Mom says I play too mechanically. Well, yeah. I'm not like a virtuoso or anything. Gimme a break! I'm sure that once I get the hang of it I'll start "playing" and not just "repeating". It took me about a year with the drum so I figure about 2 years should do it (as long as I keep it up).
Picked up a couple of CD's at the library. I need to watch someone play in order to see their technique. It's much easier to know what someone is doing if I can see it. Too many questions and no answers until the videotape tells the tale!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 7:51 PM
Finally. And it's cold. It's damp and dreary out. And it smells like fall. *sad face*. I much prefer summer myself.
Yesterday I went to the library and picked up some books I had put on hold. One is a video tape on how to play violin and the other is a book on violins. Very interesting. I haven't played the tape yet. I also got some new music to play - just to listen to.
Wednesday I had practice. I've missed the competition deadline but that's ok. I don't really have the $$ right now to spend on competing. It's funny because I love complusories but I hate programs. Most people it's the other way around.
Compulsories are like practice, tho. No music and you're on the ice with someone else. I know it's all mental but hey - I'M mental! So I like to do those and my pros usually want me to do them because technically I'm quite good (for my level). I just don't have much "artistic" value! LOL!
The Axel is looking good. Finally found the right place for my arms and I'm actually going into it at speed (which is a bit scary). It's getting closer. I'm sure if I would get off my lazy butt and go to practice more it would help! BAH!
The boss is gone for a week. YAY! Best part is - she's heading to FLA - right toward the hurricane. Is it wrong for me to be grinning in glee about it? Hey - she might get stuck down there. Who knows?
Now all of a sudden she wants me to stay. WTF??? Uh, no. As soon as I find something I'm leaving. Deal with it. I've hated that damned job from day one and she's made it clear she wants me gone. Hey, you don't have to drop a bomb on me (eventho she did). I get the picture.
Now I've started applying for jobs and you realize I'm serious. Yeah. Maybe that's your entire problem - you don't believe me when I tell you something.
It's funny because all of the stuff I've been bitching about for YEARS she finally now has decided maybe she'd better do something about it. Whatever. She doesn't want me to leave because it will make HER look bad and she'll have to find someone ELSE to dump all the work on. Boo-hoo!
But it's the weekend now and I don't have to deal with those people. I'm FREE! Wooot! Free to clean! LOL!
Tomorrow is dance class. Then I'll probably go to the store - I have a broken vase to return and I'm out of Diet Coke almost. Can't have that. Then maybe a bit of sewing and violin playing.
I was going to write a bit - Mr. Wicked was on my ass all day yesterday at work (which annoys me to no end) - but when I got home he was like "oh, forget it". Rrrrrr! Wants to strangle him!
Now I'm sitting here writing hoping that he'll speak but he's ignoring me. Fine. Whatever. I'll run him out by playing the violin again. Or worse - I'll start singing! LOL!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 6:24 PM
I'm just beginning to see, now I'm on my way. It doesn't matter to me chasing the clouds away . . .
One of my fave Moody Blues songs and rather appropriate for the occassion.
An Ephiphany of sorts today. I was talking to "a friend" regarding the work situation and he says, "well, it's not like you to just up and walk away from a confrontation. What's up with that?"
When I thought about it in that way I was like "it's not worth it. That job isn't worth fighting for because it sucks." And that's the way it is. No matter what happens, the underlying lack of accountability, training, foresight and communication isn't going to change one whit.
So why would I want to fight for it? I don't like it now. It's not going to change. And I'm not going to "grow to like it" because I see it getting WORSE over time. It's a cluster fuck now I can't imagine what it's going to be like in a year or two when things "run out".
Now that I've "come to grips" with the fact that HR isn't going to help and I don't really want that damned job anyway I've made some plans.
First, I am determined to find a new job before the end of the year. That is my priority. The rest of these hysterical fuckers can go fish. *I* am now MY own priority there. First things first and my first order of every damn day is going to be to check the job situation. Fuck the rest of them.
Second, I'm going to write up and quantify every damned project I worked on so people understand what I've been up against. There are plenty of listings out there that say "get things done" and that is something I am VERY good at. Just look at the list of things.
Third - I am printing out everything I have received from big wigs and co-workers thanking me for my help and also my awards.
If she wants to talk shit about me based on her personal opinion and have NO FACTS to back it up - she's going to come out looking like an idiot. And I don't really give a damn. Unless she can produce evidence to the contrary it's just HER opinion and she needs to get over it.
I will have the FACTS. She can ignore them all she wants but they are going to be presented and allowed to speak for themselves. Let her try to minimize everything I've done. It's not going to happen because there's simply too many things to refute.
Ah. Anyway - Bean is back. She was out sick yesterday. There's something going around. I had to tape her "gift" on the door and everyone in engineering saw it. LOL! It's one of those plastic bracelets that everyone is wearing. You know the ones that say "strength" or "live strong" or some shit like that.
Well, OURS say "live wrong". LOL! Found them at actionvillage.com (it's a skateboarding site. Hey, type "skating" into google and you get all sorts of boarding sites. But they have the best stuff anyway. I don't REALLY have a "figure skater" fashion sense. heeee!)
She thought it was too funny. It was taped on her door in the package. Which happens to read "for the REST of us". Oh hell yeah! LOL!
She came downstairs to see me and brought me some gifts from Iowa she picked up. A magnet and a pin. So cute! LOL! That pin is awesome "doesn't play well with others". You know it! LOL!
Tonight I went to the library and picked up some books on the violin and some music. I was flipping thru the ethnic music section looking for some gypsy/romanian music (for the violins) and found this CD from "Les Nubians" called "One Step Forward". It's very very good. Very smooth, nice jazzy sound with some great hand drum rhythms. The words are mostly in French but hey - it sounds good and the music is very nice. Me likes. Me may have to go buy for my very own.
Speaking of music - I was in half price books the other day and found a couple of CDs of X files music. They are surprisingly good! I was quite shocked. Not many original artists but the covers are very nice. I was impressed. Some of this stuff is just nice to listen to in the background.
Hey - I put on that Missy Elliott CD and I want to DANCE. I can't put on dance music or belly dance music and sit still. It just don't happen.
Now it's time to practice my violin. Then we'll appease Mr. Wicked by writing a bit more. That's sort of taken a back seat to all of the work drama going on. But hey, I can't help that. I gotta pay the bills, right? And he sure the hell isn't helping. Dang pointy ear don't know the value of a dollar, that's for sure!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 8:21 PM
I was busy all weekend just piddling around. Playing my violin, cooking, cleaning and thinking. I like to clean when I think or it may work the other way around. I'm not quite sure.
Yesterday I went home. Ugly didn't want a beatin'. He just wanted to get in my lap and blow snot. So I let him. It was nice to have him in my lap just wiggling and all happy to see me.
I also made up some henna and finally got it to work right. I used Pepsi as the acidic part instead of lemon juice. And since it has sugar in it, too, that worked that much better. Added a "terp" and let sit over night and it was perfect! I think I may try a different type of henna next time. This is turning out more brown than red. But that's ok. It works.
Got the buttons on Mike's tunic. Still need to finish that quilt off. I will eventually. Just not right now.
Work is going ok. I went and talked to HR today about the situation. Of course, they found it hard to believe that my boss would be so lame as to just drop a bomb on me but I'm like "well, ask her yourself."
So basically she said that I just need to deal with it. Fuck that. I figured they wouldn't be much help but at least I've made my displeasure known outside of the "realm".
I've been looking at several other jobs. Tomorrow I have a conference call with these hysterical nut cases. But they are just going to have to deal with what I tell them. I really don't give a damn. As soon as I find another job I'm outta there and someone ELSE can deal with them. Fucktards.
Basically I'm trying to get my poop in a group so I can leave and they don't have an excuse to try and hold me there - because I know they will.
It's been pretty stressful thinking about all of this and trying to find something. I feel really pressured to get the hell out of there as fast as possible because I don't see the situation changing. It's only going to get worse.
However - I think all the hoo-doo may be working. Seems that suddenly all of our meetings for the month have been cancelled and lo! The bitch is leaving on vaca Thursday. Kinda sudden I think. Not that I CARE - I just think it's weird. Hopefully good weird for ME.
Tomorrow I have a doc appt then Wednesday chiro and practice. I think this time I'll manage to stay awake. I might even hit practice at lunch tomorrow. Hey, any chance to get the hell outta there and make myself scarce is a good idea.
Mr. Wicked has been quite patient with me lately. Funny but I'm almost embarrassed to write what he wants now. Bizarre as that sounds. I just can't stand that knowing smirk of his.
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 8:57 PM
But hey, that's ok.
I DID, however, remember that I smashed my finger in a stupid lid on Monday which has made holding my bow rather painful. And drumming is out of the question. It just hurts. I was a dumb ass and did it to myself so I don't have anyone to blame for it. Oh, well.
I have been having odd dreams lately. I keep dreaming about the cemetery. The one I always see in my dreams - it's the same place I just see different parts of it. One day I'll have to sit down and make a map of it and try to draw it out. It's very cool - very old with lots of interesting tombstones and hidden paths. You'd think it'd be a nightmare dreaming about a cemetery but it's not. I rather like the place. It's really interesting. Not scary at all. I guess it COULD be and SHOULD be but it's not.
Today I went next door to talk to my old office mate about a project. The one Russian dude was there and I actually needed to talk to him, too. Bear in mind that this guy has the most AWESOME Russian accent EVAH! One day I'm going to ask him to say "must get moose and squirrell" because I know I would fall over laughing - it would sound just like the TV show! LOL!
Well, the Russian dude said about two sentences to me and I immediately pick up his accent and answer him in it. He looks at me like WTF? And I start giggling. "Oh, sorry. I didn't even realize I was doing that," I say. Then he starts laughing. I'm not making FUN of him. I'm imitating him because I LIKE it. I LIKE the way his accent sounds. It's great! Just like I used to mimic Jeremy's French accent (and still do). Hey, I'm easily amused. What can I say?
Speaking of accents - in one of my seminars yesterday there was this dude that friggin' had the Orlando hair going on - all dark and sort of long and messy - roahr! And he was British. Oh, God! He probably has no idea how close he came to being molested from behind in class! LOL! Fortunately for him, he was sitting next to the Moose - my old team leader. So I couldn't get too out of hand. Dammit!
I just let him slip right on by without so much as a raised eyebrow. Ah, well. Easy come, easy go, right?
Today I had a nice chat with a co-worker regarding my situation. He gave me some good advice - basically he said that I should go to HR and play dumb. Ask what the policies are (because I really don't know) and then ask them what I should do if I think they haven't been followed. So we're not accusing anyone of anything - we're trying to find out what's going on.
And I'm still looking for other positions, believe me. You know it really amazes me how friggin' stupid, lazy and ignorant some people can be and still get promoted. I think Seinfield did an episode about that once. It was so damned funny because it's TRUE. Those who can't do anything else are promoted. I would be willing to bet a paycheck that my so-called-manager couldn't do my job if her life depended on it. She doesn't have a fucking clue so she doesn't care how overwhelmed we are.
One of the guys who just joined our group was in the lab with me the other day and he's like "you guys work your ASSES off - I had no idea."
I just snorted. "You have no idea. Think of what it was like for just the THREE of us before YOU came. It was WORSE. And no one cares."
"That's just ridiculous," he said.
"You're preaching to the choir, dude," I answered. Really. No one cares. As long as we keep cranking out the work no one is going to give a damn. All these stupid paperwork hoops they have us jump thru are more of a hinderance than a help.
Sure, everyone is being asked to do more and more with less but when our counterparts in Japan have 15 people doing less work than US (and we only have 4 people) something is SERIOUSLY WRONG. WE make all of the money. I'm completely serious. If I told you how much money we make per year you wouldn't believe it. And yet they treat us like shit. Seems to be the theme of a lot of companies - the more valuable you are to them, the worse they treat you. WTF is up with THAT?
Do they think that by keeping you in a cage you'll start to believe all of their BS? There's no logical reason for it and yet that's the way it seems to work. Not only HERE but in most of the places I've worked. It's amazed me how the managers treat the people who are the most valuable (who do all of the work) while the candy-ass whiners and do nothings are fawned over.
Huh - probably because the candy-ass whiners are related to someone. *eye roll* How could I forget that?
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 2:18 PM
Does anyone else get it? I mean, I can be thinking the greatest things - ending world hunger or something and if someone asks me what time it is - Poof! I totally forget.
Happens a lot when I go to the store, too. I have a mental list of everything I need to get but as soon as I walk in the damn door, I swear I totally forget EVERY SINGLE THING. WTF?
Yesterday I ran into more of my buddies at the seminar. One typical conversation.
Me "Hey, Moose! How are you?"
Moose "Girl! Long time no see!"
"Have you seen Timmy?"
"Yeah, I ran into him and Statski yesterday. Who else is here?"
"I saw Goat Boy and Dammit Jimmy. I wish El Flatulante and Rollo were here. I miss them, too."
We had/have the most colorful names for everyone. I actually made a LIST and distributed it to the people that worked with us so when we'd start asking about someone they'd know what the hell we were saying. LOL! I still have it, too. Somewhere on my hard drive at work. Too funny. A lot of the people on that list have retired, too.
It was like old home week there. I really miss those guys. I'm just not cut out for this political BS. Gimme something mechanical to play with and I'm perfectly happy.
My first question is usually "how does it work?" and "can I take it apart?" Not that I'd be able to put it back TOGETHER again - I just want to find out how it operates. LOL!
Ah, so. I probably need to get back into engineering. I'm much happier dealing with THINGS than stupid people who ass kiss. *eye roll*
Speaking of engineering - I ran into Bean today. I need to talk to her regarding some other info I picked up that might relate to what SHE is doing. And I want to get some info FROM her. Can you believe it? We'll probably go to lunch and talk work. Oh, well. Shit happens sometimes. What can you do?
I was supposed to go to practice tonight and I freaking fell asleep on the couch. And I was out. Like a log. I didn't even MOVE for nearly 3 hours. I laid there, in the same position as I fell asleep in the whole time. Ended up sleeping thru practice. What a moron. I must've needed it, tho. And believe it or not, I'm still tired.
Probably from all that walking yesterday. I must've walked like 5 miles. I was completely worn out and was tired this morning when I woke up. The weather might have something to do with it, too. Whatever it is, my ass is draggin' today.
Picked up some books at B&N on my lunch hour yesterday - hence all the walking. Also more fags and rum. HAD to restock the rum supply after the hurtin' we put on sailor jerry at harvest days. Probably won't bust it out again until Mike's party but it's cheaper in the motherland so I'm going to stock up!
Last night I forgot to put my violin away after playing it. That's weird. I can play "Mary had a little lamb" and "twinkle twinkle" pretty good now. Started working on "yellow rose of texas" "america the beautiful" and "comptown races". They are coming ok. Found a whole bunch of Christmas music that's made for those of us who don't read music.
I sort of - kind of - have this strange idea of learning some of those and taking the violin downtown and playing after thanksgiving. Just to do it. We don't have any street musicians in this dead-azz town. And I'm not good by any stretch of the imagination but it's like there's something missing without street musicians. Maybe that's just me.
Or maybe the cops will come and drag me off. But I'm not doing anything illegal - well, maybe being a public nuisance. lol! Hell, I dunno WHY we don't have them. But we NEED some, IMO. They add a little "color" to the atmosphere.
Anyway - that's jumping a bit ahead of myself. I still need to get out from under the sea hag at work. Been hiding out in the motherland this week. HA! Next week, tho, I think I might have to bite the bullet so to speak. But I'm going to do my homework first.
I have a bit of a plan as well but I want to run it by the Bean or the Master Batcher first. Because they've been around longer and know the rules of the game.
Not much else I can think of right now. I'm sure as soon as I hit "publish" everything will come back to me. That's usually how it happens! LOL!
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 7:01 PM
Wasn't someone supposed to STOP me from buying a bunch of stuff I don't need? Technically I don't need it but still . . .
So this weekend I go shopping. I needed to pick up pop and get a new pair of tennis shoes. What happened? Well, I saw an ad in the paper for the Old Tyme pottery store and they had some glass that I thought would make good oil lamps.
Of course, I go over there and it's right next to the fabric store so I go in. Bad, bad move. They had Simplicity patterns for $2. Yeah, stuff that's usually like $14 was $2. I wanted to go berserk and I TRIED to go berserk but the gods smiled upon me and only three of the patterns I wanted were in stock. Whew! That was a close one!
Then I walk over to Olde Tyme Pottery. They are having a sale. On exactly the same sort of medieval oil lamps that we saw in class. They are calling them "hanging vases". Whatevah! They're oil lamps! I bought 4 of them! Our campsite is going to be so totally awesome with all of the oil lamps! Every one will be pea green with envy!
I have 6 of them burning now. They are GREAT! They are warm, bright and give off a nice smell (I burn olive oil in them. You can burn vegetable oil, too, but it doesn't last as long or smell as good.) And, since they are olive oil, if you knock them over they won't ignite like a kerosene lamp will.
This week I'm in the motherland for work. Picked up more fags and rum. Good Lord, I probably keep Dick's Liquor in business. *sigh*. Mom's like - "bring more fags back! As many cartons as you can buy! Buy two cartons every day!" Dayum, woman! What's in it for me? Do I get some rum outta this? Some beer at least!
Today was sign in day for this work seminar. I met two of the dudes I used to work with and talked to them for a while. Then, in my one class I ended up next to one of the engineers that I had/have a "thing" for. We flirt shamelessly. I mean SHAMELESSLY. Ah, he's married with two kids. heh. It's probably a good thing, tho. He has the most wicked sense of humor. We just sort of "click" in that way.
I'm sure I'll run into a few more of the guys I used to work with this week. That's always interesting. And it will give me the opportunity to see if there are any openings I can move into. Why not?
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 9:14 PM
First,,,,,---- since the asshats at CS want to insist on pestering me with their stupidity,,,,, I've disabled anonymous comments!!^&$##%&(*(&*%^!! You banned ME,,,,,,, remember????? Fuckers,,,,!!!! LOL!
To anyone else with a blog here - post away! To Sandra in particular and any of my other FF readers who want to post or talk to me, just drop me an email - the link is on the sidebar here or you can reach me thru the AFF site as well. My email is on my profile there. You know I enjoy hearing from you! And I can post your comments in a new page here.
Ah, so. I got to talk at length to the Master Batcher this morning about the job situation. Very encouraging. Seems he had a bit of the same problem and was in the same situation so he knows where I'm coming from. That was quite heartening. I asked him how he handled the situation and he said, "I prayed she'd get pregnant."
I nearly fell outta my chair laughing. Apparently it worked, too. Huh. Maybe I'll have to tape a belly on this voodoo doll. Ya think? LOL!
It was good to hear him talk about stuff. He knows a lot of the "history" and why things are the way they are. It makes it a little easier to take once I understand what's going on. And it seems that we aren't the only ones who suffer from lack of training - it's pretty rampant.
How we manage to stay in business sometimes amazes me. A lot of people don't have an earthly clue as to what is going on. Me included. The rules change every day and the players change every day. One minute you're playing hockey with the Sabers and the next it's tiddlywinks with a 3 year old. WTF???
It was a nice long talk about various things. He finally had the time to chat (I've been patiently waiting for two weeks to talk - a miracle in and of itself that I was actually PATIENT). I had a dream about him last night - that he shipped me some stuff and was worried about it so I called today. Sure enough, he'd shipped some stuff that should be arriving today and it's in somone else's names (customs).
He was sorta weirded out by this (it's the second time I've done it in as many weeks - called him and asked him what he wanted BEFORE he called ME). But, hey. I think of it as a "radio frequency" like thing. I'm "receiving" on the same "frequency" that he's sending out.
Some radios can pick up all sorts of frequencies. Some only pick up certain frequencies (like police scanners). Apparently he's operating on my particular frequency so I keep getting his transmissions. (You have to be BROADCASTING on a particular "frequency" in order for someone to "hear" it). *shrug* That's the way I think of it anyway.
Hey - you don't want me to hear it then don't get on my frequency and broadcast, right? LOL!
Anyway - we had a nice long chat about stuff and it made me feel a lot better to know that it happened to him as well. It's just crazy. But that's what you get when people are more interested in self-promotion than actually doing a good job. And there are a LOT of those around here.
Lilibean and I are supposed to go out for dinner after work but I have a sneaking suspicion that she's forgotten. Curse her hide! And she'll have some feelbe excuse like "oh, I have to fly to London" or some lame ass shit like that! Can you believe it? You suck, Lili! So there!
I was lazy last night and didn't drum or play my violin. I sat down a wrote for a while. And also spend an inordinate amount of time at the MB trying to keep up with the situation.
It would seem that the majority has spoken. I don't agree with it but I have to live with it (much as I must live with the smirking shrub that I despise). I can see everyone's fears about the situation. But the deed is done so we'll see what happens.
So glad it's Friday! Yay! Not sure what I'm doing this weekend, tho. It's going to be cold. Ugh. Guess it's time to put the summer clothes away. So bogus.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 9:09 AM
And maybe not.
An update on the messageboard saga/drama. It would seem that one of those who chose to turn a blind eye to the mass banishment has now discovered our hideout and wishes to join us. Personally, I think it's a Very Bad Idea.
Why? Well, because X claims to know NOTHING of what happened altho they were there the entire time and saw people's names get changed and their posts disappeared. Now that everyone "cool" has been exiled and X doesn't have anyone to talk to, X wants to "make nice" with us. When X wouldn't even utter a peep asking where the hell all of us went to in the first place. o_O
I dunno. I don't like it. It brings up a lot of very bad feelings. It wasn't like I chose to leave - I was thrown out without so much as a notice. Just one day I went there and "poof" my account had been blocked. Why, I still don't know. Most of us were treated that way. Now one who knew about the bannings wants to "make nice" because all the cool people went elsewhere? Uh, no.
Maybe if X had said something before NOW. But no. X was happy. Now the place is circling the drain and X wants out. X wants in OUR club after thumbing the nose at us.
Not that I have anything personal against X. It doesn't matter to me. I just don't want to feel like I have to walk around on eggshells because one person out of 100 might be "offended" that I'm joking about being exiled. Or trying to "explain" why I shouldn't be pissed about being thrown out of somewhere when I didn't DO anything to warrant it.
Also, there is a fear that once X gets in they will start inviting all of their "buddies" and things will go back downhill. I don't want that to happen.
Hey - X is emailing the people they want to so why drag the rest of us into it?
Bah! Anyway. Practice last night. Did some seriously amazing camel spins. Now my back is like sore at the top from all the arching. Ah! I must be getting old. Ugh.
I went back today at lunch to go over my moves. Had the rink all to myself and it was nice. My moves suck. If I'm going to be testing I need to get off of my ass and really work. Like 3-4 times a week. They were good like over the winter when I was skating a lot. But with summer and camping (and rum) - well, I've been slacking! Now it's time to shape up!
But dang, my jumps are awesome. My toe jumps anyway. I did this lutz today - it was so damned high it actually scared me! Thinking this must be a fluke (they normally aren't THAT huge) I tried it again - another massive one. So I measured the distance - yup - enough for a double.
Whoa! I was suitably impressed. Dunno what the hell I was doing differently. Well, I think I do - my feet are actually drawing together like they are SUPPOSED to. I have a bad habit to just do slop (because of my leg strength). When technique and power come together - whoa! It's a little scary!
Didn't have time to try an axel, tho. Had to return to the salt mines. Speaking of which - I don't want to curse myself so I'm not going to say anything. I've been hiding out and furitively looking for a new job. I want outta here. And soon. I have a feeling more shit is going to be hitting the fan in a few weeks since one of our group is going on DB.
Any guesses as to who is going to be stuck with her work? Yeah.
Still drumming. Actually starting to play with CD's now and that's pretty cool. It's like being in a drum circle sans alcohol and dancers. lol! Of course, I could grab a beer outta the 'fridge and PRETEND. (I'll probably do that this winter when I've got cabin fever so bad I just want to scream).
The violin is coming along, too. Getting better at knowing what I'm doing wrong. And actually holding the bow properly - picking it up right and holding it right as I play. So that's good. And my right hand (the one I hold the strings with) looks like in the pictures. Been using a mirror to watch myself - to see that my elbows and hands are doing right. I'm still getting used to WHERE exactly the bow needs to go - it tends to wander if I'm looking at the music and not directly at IT. Has a mind of it's own, it does.
I'll be glad when the weekend is here. It's supposed to be cooler and that's bogus. The last week has been just awesome weather wise. But it's not going to last. I'll have to break out the electric blanket by the end of the month I think. So bogus! :-(
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 3:12 PM
Tomorrow I have a meeting. I'm not looking forward to this at all. Things are acting mighty suspicious. o-O Makes me wonder what's going on.
I've put some weight on and I am unhappy about this. Only 6 lbs but still - it's bogus. One of these days I'm just going to say "fuck it" and get ginormously fat. I kinda wonder how fat I WOULD actually get if I ate like I wanted. hmmmm. Maybe I'll do a scientific study. heh.
Tomorrow is skating practice. I have a lesson. I think I might have to bite the bullet and test in November. Ugh. I really need to stop goofing off and start seriously practicing for a competiton and testing. I'm such a slacker!
Playing the violin and drum every day. I've got to the point where I can play "mary had a little lamb" and "twinkle twinkle" fairly well altho my hands are not steady. That is odd considering how steady they are when I need to weigh out pigment to 0.0003 grams on the analytical balance. Then they are like granite.
Maybe because I don't know how hard to push on the bow - my hands aren't used to the pressure yet. But we are getting there.
I've been thinking about a lot of personal things lately. None of which I'd like to spill. It brings up too many things I don't know if I'm ready to deal with right now. One crisis at a time, thankyouverymuch. But I DID cut out some words for my post secret. I seriously doubt if I will send one in but it was rather theraputic to cut out words and paste them on a piece of paper and look at them.
My horoscope is quite optimistic for this month. Let us hope the planets are kinder to me than the fates have been lately. Mmmm.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 8:27 PM
Today was. Or yesterday since it's like, officially Sunday. Isn't it? Or is the time change this weekend? Well, I'll find out tomorrow, won't I?
I was bad and skipped dance practice today. I overslept. Must've needed it. Then I went to the bookstore at the mall. I haven't been in there in about a year. The mall, I mean.
Bought a couple of books. Two on psych, one palmistry and two on playing the violin. One of the violin books actually had "Twinkle Twinkle little star" and "Mary had a little lamb" and I practiced those tonight.
Oh! Thursday I had dinner with my bff. I took my violin with me because she loves violins and I thought she might be interested in getting one of her own. Well, it was our fave Mexican place and they just so happened to have a Mariachi band there. And one of the guys in the band just so happened to be able to play the violin. How cool is that? So he tuned my violin and played it for us! It was great! So I know it works and makes good noise because I heard it! (The E string was screechy because 1 there wasn't enough rosin on the bow and 2 the string keeps slipping and won't stay in tune).
At the music store I was talking to the clerk about it and he's like "so, is it hard to play?" I'm like "the hell if I know! I just thought I'd give it a try." I think it might be but I'm still not sure. Right now it's not too bad.
Of course, while I was in there I had to plop down and play their drums. I was not impressed by their selection. But they seemed intrigued that I could play. Only the middle eastern stuff, I assured them. I don't know anything "modern" or "current". No need to where I play.
Then tonight I went skating. It was nice and deserted. Some dude asked me if I teach. He thought I was still in college. har-har! Not hardly, hon. Not for many years. I gave him a few names so hopefully he'll contact someone. He said he was more interested in private lessons than group. Hey, whatever.
Now AFF has a notice that we have to put disclaimers on all of our stuff. What a pain! Means everything is going to get bumped around. Oh, well. Hopefully it will shake out soon. We have until the end of the month then they are going to start deleting things. I guess someone must've raised a stink about the copyrights or something. Who knows?
I updated all of mine with the disclaimer so hopefully I'm safe.
Tomorrow I'm going to go home and beat the creature. He needs it. I know he's been blowing snot and getting fur everywhere. That's what he does best.
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The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 12:36 AM
