Seriously.
As I had written before, my Aunt Bea died at the beginning of December (and Kim, her daughter, died in July). So I really wasn't too enthused about the holidays to begin with.
On Christmas Day, mom and I went to visit Uncle Barry (her younger brother) and take him some dinner.
We found him dead.
Epic suck.
So this has been the WORST holiday EVER as far as I'm concerned.
Nothing like spending your holiday with the cops, the coroner and the mortician. Oh, joy!
Like I'm sure they would have rather been elsewhere as well.
This last 6 months has just been an epic suck for me and my family.
I'll be glad to see the New Year and put this crappy one behind me.
Hopefully it will be better.
I don't think I have been so emotionally exhausted in the last 20 years. I cried so long and hard I didn't think I would ever stop (which made me cry harder because I was scared). Now how dumb is that? To cry because you're afraid you won't stop crying.
I still really can't talk about it because I start up again and I really need to stop it before I dehydrate myself.
That's about all I care to say about it right now.
The dog is fine. She's probably glad to see the back of me since I've been home for a few days scooping her up and kissing her all over her flat face and using her as a crying rag.
She got a new bed and a new blankie for Christmas. She really likes her new bed. It is smaller than her other bed in the kitchen and furry so it might be warmer for her.
I've had a fire going every day that I've been home. It's been nice and warm (about 80 degrees in the kitchen) so the both of us are just as happy as pigs in shit.
And since I got some new books for Christmas, I've just been laying around on my makeshift bed in the kitchen and reading. The dog loves it because she lays there with me all nice and warm. Neither one of us moves unless we're hungry or have to potty.
We still take our long walks in the morning and in the evening but over this past weekend I had no ambition to do anything but lay around. Considering everything that's happened recently, I felt like I deserved a day or two of just rest with absolutely NO DRAMA whatsoever.
It feels like I've been living in a fucking "Drama o'rama" here lately.
Today more of the same. I have to work this week which is tolerable as it takes my mind off of other things. But tonight I will be laying around reading again. Or maybe watch Monday Night Football. It depends on how I feel.
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 2:00 PM
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