I had the absolute best dream EVAH last night! And so well-deserved, I might add. No, it wasn't a wet dream but sweet just the same.
I dreamed that I was at an SCA event and I was looking for my crock pot. I had something I wanted to cook in it for feast. So I'm looking all over for this thing and I run into a lady I know.
"What are you looking for?" She asks.
"My crock pot and I can't find it."
"I'll help you look," she offers.
"Nah," I say. "It's just a stupid dream and doesn't matter anyway."
She looks at me and says, "well, if it's just a stupid dream, why aren't you chasing Orlando?"
I look at her and say, "WTF? I'm an idiot! Why didn't I think of that? Where is he?"
And she points so somewhere (I dunno) "over there". So I start walking to where she pointed. I ran into courtiers and tried not to be rude as I slogged thru them. Then His Majesty of the Midrealm stopped me but I told him I was on a "mission" and kept going.
I walked and walked until I came to this big cliff. At the bottom of the cliff in this big field was THE MAN surrounded by fangirls. They aren't screaming or crying or anything, they are all just sitting there on the ground, staring up at him in awe. So I run down this cliff into the field and he's sitting there in a recliner with his legs thrown over the arm of it (sitting in it sideways) and signing autographs.
A few people stand up and tell me that I can't talk to him, that he doesn't want any screaming or hysterical fangirls or he'll go away.
"Fuck that shit! It's my dream and I'm having him!" I say and literally launch myself at him flat out.
I land right in his lap, belly to belly and he lets out this "oof" noise when I land. I start kissing him all over his cute little face and he starts giggling. No body tries to pull me off of him or anything. Everyone else is just sitting there with these stunned looks on their faces and I'm just kissing him all over as he's laughing.
Ah, mon dieu! The next few moments will be burned into my sordid little black heart forever. (Or at least until next month). I look into those chocolate brown eyes and kiss him right on the lips. Lips only at this point ('cause for all I know he could freak out at any time!). And he kisses me back!
Oh, help me! And it was good! Wonderful kisses. Not just because it was HIM but it was those nice soft slow kisses. No slobbering, no tongue jamming down your throat, no yawning open mouth. Just lips and a little tongue now and then. Good Lord it's a wonder I didn't die in my sleep from the sheer bliss of it! It was so slow. Mmmmmm! Slow and delicious. What sweet torture! I was lying on top of him - right where I landed - and we're just kissing and kissing and he moans real quiet like and I just want to DIE right there on the spot! It was one of those "oooo yeah" moans that just make your panties all wet when you hear it. I wanted it to go on forever and he didn't seem too interested in stopping, either. And nobody bothers us. No one! We're just making out in this chair and everyone is just kinda stunned.
It was so freaking REAL, I swear! I could smell him and feel his hands in my hair. My ribs even hurt where I was pressing against him at such a weird angle. How bizarre is THAT? And we just kept kissing. Why in the hell I didn't try to rip his clothes off I don't know. Probably because the kissing was so good the thought didn't even enter my mind. (I mean, someone ELSE had to tell me to go look for him, right? Shows you how observant I am!)
When we finally stopped - I rested my head on his shoulder and we started talking. He called me "ginger" for some bizarre reason (probably the red hair).
I told him he needed some "good red headed lovin'" and he answered, "I don't need anyone in my life right now."
I'm like "honey, I ain't talking about getting into your life, I just want in your pants. Let's be clear, here."
He cracked up at this and started blushing! Oh my GOD he was so cute! Those big chocolate eyes and that vanilla smile! I just wanted to eat him up! And we started kissing again. Oh, it was divine!
Then! Just when he gets ready to answer my offer! My fucking stomach starts growling and wakes me UP!!! I was soooooo pissed! WTF??? Why is it growling in the middle of the night? Was it because the Big O was looking like an ice cream ready to be licked? Was it because of the chocolate eyes and vanilla smile? Hell no! I was fucking HUNGRY!!! Now if that isn't the biggest crock (pot) of BS!
But, damn! It was sweet! Those kisses - ooooo - if only I could find a REAL guy that could kiss like that instead of trying to eat your face off. That'd be really sweet! Mmmmm. What a wonderful dream.
Of course, my co-workers are all like "what are you grinning about today?" I just giggle and say "you don't wanna know". And they leave it at that. 'Cause, let's face it, they really don't!
The Rogue Goddess saw shadows dancing at 2:41 PM
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